Top 5 Mustaches

What do women want?

I've got the answer. It's thick, and hairy. And only a few men who have them can work it. Here's 5 who do it best:

#1 Ron Swanson, Parks and Recreation

Wondrous in it's beauty, precision and thickness; Swanson, aka Nick Offerman, presents to us his beautiful mustache weekly on Parks and Rec. Probably one of my favorite shows, the mustache accompanies a delightfully sarcastic and arrogant persona. With great responsibility comes great mustache. Pyramid of Greatness. Also, that hair. Amazing

#2 Frederich Wilhelm Nietzsche

A much loved philosopher by all those who study him. Mustache, although much less studied, is as exuberant and pretentious. Nietzsche sets a high standard for fluff, shape and thickness in the "I'm also an asshole" category.

#3 Joseph Stalin

A not so loved historical mustache of grand proportions. Notice the side view here, and how the hair actually pr

otrudes from his face. Great thickness and well groomed. He'd probably look like a baby if it weren't for this bad-boy.

#4 Tom Selleck

The ol' and pretty: Magnum, PI. Many of you youngsters don't know about ol' Tom, but here's a lesson: if Chuck Norris had a lover, it would be Tom Selleck.

Look at that face, and its as though that beautiful mustache just adds so much drama to the look. Without it he might just look friendly. So badass.

#5 Burt Reynolds (Bandit era)

Oh Burt. You have made millions of women swoon over you in your T-roof Trans Am, whereas I just adore that beautifully groomed black beauty. Sure, the car is nice, but what good is a rear view mirror when every time you look back you see that glory.

Honorable Mentions:

Ron Burgundy

The legend wouldn't be complete without the coarse, shapely mustache of Ron Burgundy. Afternoon delight? How about anytime? Stay classy.

Randy Marsh

Although a fictional character, Randy's 'stache has clearly done great things for the role. It accompanies him through all of his intelligent musings. Excellence.

Polygamy and Love

Right now, I'm watching the TLC show Sister Wives. I used to not be sure how I felt about men with multiple wives, but now I know exactly what my feelings are.

There are probably, very likely, many polygamist families existing peacefully. But, conceptually and theoretically speaking, it is not possible to have an equal and loving relationship between a man and several women. There will always been needs not being met and jealousy between wives.

The basic human emotions of selfishness and possessiveness, are things that need to be stepped above. But the essentialism of a two-person loving relationship becomes skewed when more women become involved. It is impossible, and not only that but harmful to those involved, to have to literally 'share' your husband. The whole point of a relationship is mutuality and completeness--not being pulled each way.

Like I said. It's just my view. I would never ever pull myself in multiple directions. I am a commitment-phobe but I am still in hopes of finding someone to share my life with. It's really just not for me.

They're out to get us?

So it's final: this morning the writ was dropped. For those of you who aren't familiar with election speak it basically means we're having a late spring Federal election. May 2nd to be exact.

Why that date? Well there's a lot of choosing that goes into it, there has to be a minimum amount of campaign time and Elections Canada certainly has a lot to do to make sure everything is set up for then.

It's not the closeness of the election that worries me, however. It's the fact that on May 2nd, every student in Waterloo will either be here for the summer (Most summer leases start May 1st) or at home, where the influence of parents or general apathy will set in.

May 2nd will decide the future of a nation. It's not in our hands. Think about how much influence your fellow students could have on you should you decide to vote. With the uptake of the WLUSU election at an all time high, apathy may just be at its lowest here at Laurier. Could the election have a promising result should it have been held earlier? Considering it is essay and exam time, thateven less likely.

The real problem is that May 2nd will pretty much exclude all student participation. With most of our mail going to our student riding, registering to vote at home may be difficult, depending on your situation. Remember the 2008 Election? Remember how hard it was to vote here?

The process itself isn't student friendly. And now, the timing isn't either. Voting at home leaves student ridings at a loss of voice. I only hope whoever stays here this summer gets their ass to the polls. Otherwise, the permanent residents of this riding will again vote in the blue Tory who .....didn't do anything (what a surprise!).

Change is a futile exercise in management of peoples and their opinions.

The conservatives do it best by not doing anything at all. Appeal to the masses, but the doctrine doesn't change. They'll win, for sure, but nobody will be happy about it. I foresee another election in a couple of years.

They're out to get us! I swear!

Doing it for the butterflies.

This evening, I am swamped with work, battling a very sore throat, and best of all... I'm happy.

I'm listening to a lot of music I know makes me feel better, and between a bag of Ricola, Rawleigh's ointment and a call to Mom, I feel amazing....despite the circumstances.

I wonder if it's that, or the giddy feeling I get when I let love take over. It's a warm, fuzzy feeling, that is; and oh my, it's great.

Whoever said that crushes were never harmless was only right half the time. Here's to that.

Why NOONE actually respects Jersey Shore

(and consequently, New Jersey in general)

Jersey Shore is everyone's show they love to hate. They love to watch, poke fun, follow the drama and laugh at the fakeness of everyone on the MTV hit series. In all seriousness, it's not different than a more fabricated, pointless version of The Real World. But even The Real World was worth looking into: a Baudrillardian simulation. Wiki that if you don't see the link, I don't feel like explaining.

Jersey Shore has no 'real' or useful referent--it's useless garbage produced for laughs. It's racist, sexist, misogynist, and probably more inappropriate 'ist's I haven't thought of. There are no real characters, only persona: the 'Situation' is only an alter-ego created by a poor, pathetic Elmer Fud-ian who probably has penis envy.

Nothing ever really 'happens' on The Shore either-- people 'smush', they go out to drink, they tan.... All high-risk activities that we'd probably rather watch people do in combination than do them ourselves. We can live vicariously through the Shore-ians, but only to a point--then it gets boring.

Aside from melodrama, and breakups that seem to come full circle by the end of the episode, Jersey Shore is the epitome of awful TV. Yet, everyone watches it every Thursday night--to the point where people call it "Jersday". Phrases and mannerisms are copied from the show into real life, and tanning has once again started to re-gain its lost popularity.

Why? Why would we ever want to look like the oompa loompa Snooki, or have humungous breasts like Jwoww, be a pathetic sack of bones like Sammie, or whomever? All of the persona on the show are flawed and alcoholic, yet in an interview with Rolling Stone all reveal to have some form of post-secondary education.

If that doesn't make me lose faith in the natural selection of the world, nothing will. Noone respects JShore because it's the bottom-of-the-barrel that makes us feel better about how well off we are: when we drink every weekend it becomes 'okay' because they do it every night. Seemingly our vices become virtuous in light of The Shore.

Why I'd watch Jersey Shore over something like Storage Wars or Pawn Stars? Populous and popularity: its nice to have a common denominator with others on campus. Even if it's the lowest common denominator.

Laurier: Home for the Hardcore

With exams looming ominously, hanging like a black cloud over the essay-ridden heads of the Laurier student body, there’s another issue at hand: mental illness.

Mental illness, not simply depression, is a serious issue on campus. Prevalent, yet invisible, students are suffering in silence. One in ten Ontario students report experiencing three or more mental health issues, including depression and anxiety, according to the 2003 Mental Health and Well-Being of Ontario Students Report, published by the Centre for Addiction and Mental Health (CAMH) in Toronto.

One in ten: a large portion of Laurier students and this is only the reported number in 2003. Now that it’s 2011, and with the burdened economy, job prospects looking slim, and recent grads skimming by on part-time positions and unpaid internships, it’s easy to see where a lot of the grounds for illness come from. Many of us may never experience these issues, many may never see the inside of a psychiatric ward or rely on medication to feel ‘normal’, but it is the unfortunate truth for an increasing number of students.

Not all who suffer seek help, and those who do are facing barriers that are building instead of breaking down. Laurier’s Counselling Services experiences peak periods during exams---a statement that would discourage some from even trying to see help. Emergency room wait times, 6 hours at best, discourage people from supervised inpatient treatment. And of course, the stigma that still surrounds mental illness as something to ‘suck up’, something to ‘get over’ or those suffering as ‘crazies’ or ‘loonies’ in addition to the lack of services.

These words may come as a surprise. Counselling services has offered help to an immense amount of the population at one point or another, and continues to book up solid into the early summer. They offer a variety of options and referrals for everyone. Basically, they’re the pillar of strength that Laurier needs. But it’s not enough: the amount of counselling and on-campus inclusive services is not meeting the growing amount of students seeking help—and those who are not.

Laurier is becoming the home for the hardcore—students taking on full course-loads, jobs, financial troubles and the usual drama, along with mental illness it becomes a daily struggle to stay above water. The university needs to offer additional services, along with the great ones it does offer like PEER and Counselling services, in order to meet the growing demand of students seeking help, and try to reach out to those who do not. It doesn’t have to be like this: we don’t have to sit in the dark and pretend like everything is okay: because it’s not, and we deserve to feel cared for.

What I've been up to:

http://free-admission.com/2011/02/17/guest-post-the-artmusic-shuffle/

http://free-admission.com/2011/03/17/feedback-loop-pre-screening-of-not-afraid-to-die/

How to Be a Good Spouse in the 1930s « Thought Catalog

How to Be a Good Spouse in the 1930s « Thought Catalog