Oh What a Day

So, as I was walking home from work today I had a little bit of a revelation. I haven't had a legitimate date or boyfriend since first year. I'm entering my fourth. Yikes?! Did my biological clock suddenly turn on, did I realize that I'm turning into a crazy cat lady with crazy cat lady friends--- or simply, did I realize that within a few days, it'll be exactly a year.

A year since it all 'went down'. Sure, it seems a little reflective for my liking, but it's been a year since I realized I didn't want to be who I was, and became instead who I am now. I had been a long time coming. All new clothes, unfortunately -- and new shoes. New choices. Am I back to where I was? Lonely and feeling fat?

Is it time again, for that change? Am I going through yet another remodel?

What will I become, if not an improvement upon what I am now.. There's just a lot running through my head. Running in general. I wish I could put foot to pavement instead of hand to keyboard/pen to paper. There's a lot I want to get out, and I don't want to say it.

OH well.

Why am I [so] alone?