Days 3 through 6

The past few days have been crazy. Shopping, more shopping, intermittent with fights and highs of fitting into smaller sizes. I never thought I'd be a 12 again, anytime soon.

I guess that we focus our lives about being this perfection we cannot achieve. It's such a useless plight we set up for ourselves, as well. Eat, shit, gain. Shit.

I guess I've let jealousy take a hold of me. I'm angry that you're not jealous of my new body, I'm jealous of Krista and the fact she's taken a hold on someone who has my heart, I'm jealous of Kate for standing in my way.

I'm the kind of person with ambition up the yingyang. I get what I want, because I fight for it. Jealousy has gotten in my way, and it's getting on my nerves. The only thing I have been fighting for that has come my way is the weight loss, and that is slow and surely coming, but key word being slow, there.

Day 6 ends with a slow walk and ice cream shop. I miss my guy friends. I'm sick of acting like a girl...