Monday, June 28, 2010

In the middle of the night, in the middle of the road

Tonight, the stars are out. Literally, the sky is finally open enough to see the beautiful night. It's not something I get to see down here very often. When I go home, I can see the northern lights. I turn up my music, trying to drown out that voice in my head that is so troubled and conflicted.
I try writing, try to spill out of me the tears and troubles I keep running over and over in my head. But nothing is working, tonight.

I try to listen to songs that once got me out of the saddest times, but nothing seems to dull the pain. All i hear is this wail, this whine, that won't make anything right. Why can't I just be happy? Move on? I really just want to let this go, and turn the page. But I laugh, and love what I lost.

I haven't had a real migraine in a while, but one is coming. I feel my eyes twinge and crinkle at the sides. The light is no longer a friend, the sound keeps pounding at my head. I fear the bugs that keep climbing in around my air conditioner. Why do the little things irk me so much when I am tired?

I don't even know what is bothering me anymore, or why it's bothering me so much. It's a weird feeling to hate a situation but not be able to know what exactly that situation is.

I think I'll feel better if we hung out soon. Either that or you tell me you love me. Hahahahah
Your choice.

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